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ever wish you had a cheat sheet for how to blend your family?
… that actually helped both partners??
“Thank you ♥️ I am really glad I stumbled across your guide. I can’t express enough how much I needed to see that the obstacles we are facing are normal and what realistic expectations to have.”
Whether you’re a parent or a stepparent, this whole blending-a-family adventure has probably been full of way more ups and downs than you ever expected. The truth is, the default setting is hard. And not because one or the other of you is doing something super wrong — it’s hard because we have no idea what we’re doing.
The reality of stepfamily life is that you and your partner are in this together and it will take both of you working together to blend your family.
But finding resources that apply to both partners in a stepcouple is damn near impossible.
That’s why my husband Dan & I created How to Actually Blend: The Missing Instruction Manual for Stepcouples, a guide that explains the trickiest yet most essential stepfamily basics to help you and your partner get on the same page. (Complete with discussion questions to get the ball rolling on those hard conversations.)
GRAB THE GUIDE FOR $34! >>
you can even check out the intro for free!
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“This has been the only way that I could get my significant other to understand how I felt and that it wasn’t just me or me being selfish. Thank you. 🙏🏼”
Hi, we’re Dan & Maarit! We pulled our heads out and you can too!
THIS GUIDE IS A SHORTCUT TO HELP BOTH PARTNERS IN A STEPCOUPLE GET ON THE SAME PAGE.
Dan and I spent a lot of time blaming ourselves for our family’s failure to blend. And when we weren’t busy blaming ourselves, we were blaming each other. Any resources I found on stepfamily life were geared toward the stepparent, yet every one of them said the same thing: that what I needed most to succeed as a stepparent was the help of my partner.
So… where were the books and articles that could explain that to Dan??
::crickets::
Our family couldn’t blend until Dan & I pulled our respective heads out of our respective asses and started working together as a team. And yours won’t blend till you and your partner can pull your heads out and work together as a team, either. Which is where this guide comes in.
We’re not presenting this info from a stepparent's view. We’re not presenting it from the primary parent's view, either. Instead, you'll get both our viewpoints — and both of our balanced + honest perspectives.
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HOW TO ACTUALLY BLEND covers the critical basics you need to blend your family with less friction and stress:
✅ The realities of stepfamily life vs. our preconceptions
✅ How to get your relationship on rock-solid ground
✅ The best way to support the kids (and ourselves… and each other!)
✅ Co-parenting 101: what works and what doesn’t
Plus videos on:
🎬 Being your partner's advocate with the kids
🎬 Post-divorce parenting
🎬 Toxic co-parenting
🎬 How to support each other without losing ourselves
Basically, this guide is a simplified crash course on everything we wish we’d known a decade ago.
Heck, even learning half this stuff would’ve saved us years of frustration. So PLEASE! Learn from our mistakes!! 🤣🤦🏻♀️
(…seriously though, please do!)
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“I highly recommend you watch this with your partner! My husband and I watched last night. It was really maybe the first stepfamily thing I could get him to do with me. Typically I share articles and sections of books and I feel like he’s not really into reading them, which is majorly disappointing. But I know he’s really missing the bio dad perspective and he gets it here. So thankful for this!”
need more help? start here!