ABOUT THIS SITE
(& ABOUT US TOO)
The goal of Blended Family Frappé is not to help you create the perfect blended family. That’s never gonna happen; perfection doesn’t exist. And trying to achieve that impossible standard will only burn you out big time.
Instead, our goal is to help you carve some semblance of calm out from under all that stupid chaos. Connect you with the help you need not just for yourself as a stepparent, but also resources for your partner — because both partners being active & involved is absolutely critical to your stepfamily’s success. Which my husband Dan & I learned the hard way.
So while most of this site is written from the perspective of me, Maarit, the stepparent, Dan has helped me plan and create every single offer and resource here at Blended Family Frappé.
If we can save even one stepfamily even one teensy fraction of the confusion & heartbreak & tears & stress & resentment & frustration & loneliness that we felt in our earliest blending years, that's good enough for us.
Hopefully that family will be yours! 💕
meet maarit:
writer, artist, mama, stepmama
Helloooo! I’m Maarit (pronounced like “Margaret” without the ‘grr’) — the creator behind Blended Family Frappé. A writer, artist, and former single mama turned stepmama, I hope this little corner of the internet serves as a haven for all the blended families out there like ours who are hunkered down fighting against high-conflict situations.
If that's you, then welcome. 🧡 You’re in the right place.
I've been a mom for 20+ years, a stepmom for 15+, and was one of the founding moderators over at the stepparent support subreddit. I’ve been nominated for Best Stepmom Blog and named a Top 10 Blended Family Blog. Blended Family Frappé was also listed as one of the best blended family Instagram accounts to follow.
When I’m not running this site, I’m probably eating tacos while watching Star Wars.
meet dan:
TOP-NOTCH HUSBAND & chief optimism officer
My husband Dan is our self-proclaimed Chief Optimism Officer. He’s also our newly appointed Executive Dispatch & Logistical Adhesive Affirmations Engineer. (That is, he runs our sticker shop.)
Here’s what Dan has to say about himself in his own words:
Hi! I'm Dan The Husband. Husband to one lovely Wife, father of two awesome kids (one step, one bio), survivor of one rough-n-tumble divorce.
We went through the wringer on this one with verbal/emotional abuse, alienation, and General Difficulty all around. But we came out tempered, full of character, and charming — head held high and full of insights!
JK! It wrecked us and pretty much had our asses handed to us in the first half of our court battles. We did eventually get our divorce court sea legs under us enough to hold our own. We learned so much from this and in the years since have spent many thousands of hours in reflection and discussion on how we got here, what we got right, and how to do better. It's The Dream, right?!
Well maybe not but I didn't get the title of COO (Chief Optimism Officer) of Blended Family Frappé out of nowhere. Here, I'll do my best to impart my optimism, sprinkled with a healthy dose of dark humor, and show you The Light At The End Of The Tunnel. This shit doesn't last forever and even if it's hard to see at first there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.
PS. I like collecting and climbing rocks and I stop to smell most every flower I meet.
HOW WE SUPPORT STRUGGLING STEPFAMILIES
Blending a family is a complex topic — especially if you’re dealing with a high conflict ex! — so we’ve put together a comprehensive collection of resources to support you along the way.
💖 NICE THINGS FOLKS HAVE SAID 💖
OUR VALUES
We believe that "blending" and "stepparenting" can look different for every family, and we support you finding your own way forward without judgment.
We support stepfamilies of all races and religions, all sexual orientations and gender identities, and all walks of life.
We’re committed to creating a safe, inclusive space for LGBTQ+ stepparents and stepparents of color.
We believe that finances shouldn’t be a barrier to you and your stepfam getting the help you need. We’ve rolled all our paid offers into a low-cost monthly subscription. Sign up for however long you need the help, and unsubscribe when you’re ready to move on.
The cultural and physical elements of the land where we live informs us and shapes us. Similarly, Blended Family Frappé has been shaped and influenced by all the places that held us throughout its inception & creation — even those places where we stayed only for brief periods.
🧗🏼 Thank you to Las Vegas, the place we met and where our roots as a family began, and the unceded current and ancestral homeland of the Southern Paiute (Nuwu) people. Las Vegas taught me that even the harshest and most barren-seeming land can support new life. Against all odds.
🏔️ Thank you to Colorado, the current and traditional homeland and unceded territory of the Ute, Cheyenne, Comanche, and Apache peoples, as well as many other tribes. These lands gave me the gift of courage to finally launch this site. Thank you to the magpies and the mountains for reminding me that not all of life is a bleak desert.
🌲 Thank you to Minnesota, to the ceded and unceded land and water that is the current and ancestral homeland to the Anishinaabe and Dakota peoples. Your woods and lakes and thunderstorms and loonsong and lilacs have eased my heart more times than I can count. Thank you to the Hüs for sunrises & coffee, and and for supporting our family through a time of deep healing.
🌴 Thank you to Hawai’i and the native Hawai’ians for sharing your ‘āina, a sacred land yielded by Queen Lili’uokalani under duress to avoid bloodshed. I am so grateful for your gifts of mana and aloha and ohana. Thank you for ho’oponopono, and thank you for teaching me how to recognize my own kuleana.
🌵 And finally, thank you to Tucson, the current and ancestral home to the Tohono O’odham Nation and Pasqua Yaqui Tribe, whose people have been living and working on this land since time immemorial. Every day, Tucson teaches me the beauty of contradiction — that deserts can be lush and green; that grief and love can peacefully co-exist; that sharp cactus and acrid creosote can nourish my soul. Thank you too for the first day of Spring and fresh starts, and for reminding us that seeds left dormant for years can still sprout strong once planted.
