HEY, WELCOME!

There’s no way around it: figuring out this stepfamily stuff can feel ridiculously complicated. But WHY??

That’s the question I asked myself pretty much continuously throughout my early stepparenting years. Whyyyy did blended family life seem so easy for other people and so friggin’ hard for us?

If you’re reading this and nodding along vigorously, you’re in the right place, my friend. Because my husband Dan & I (you can get to know us here) spent the last several years searching for those answers ourselves. Eventually I created this site to share our experiences & insights with other folks who felt as overwhelmed by this whole blending thing as we did.

And now here you are! Yay!!

Before we dive in, here’s a handy dandy acronym guide to help translate any confusing abbreviations you might run into along the way.

HOW WE HELP

The #1 way we support stepfamilies is through education. Stepfamily dynamics are unique and complex; blending a family is not like life in a traditional family — you need a totally different mindset as well as a brand new skillset. That’s why we offer a whole slew of paid and free resources:

4 ELEMENTS FOR STEPFAM SUCCESS

There’s a ton of different factors that impact the way your stepfamily blends (or not). For me & Dan, successfully blending our own family ultimately came down to 4 specific components:

🧡 I had to redefine my role as a stepparent (and really, redefine my entire idea of what “blended” even meant)

💖 Dan had to take an active role in blending our family also — it wasn’t all on me as a stepparent to figure out

💕 Together, we needed to get on the same page about how to move forward as a family

🔥 Together, we needed to learn effective strategies to combat the larger issues we were facing, like conflict between houses and scary court battles

These 4 building blocks aren’t necessarily sequential, but change DOES tend to begin with the stepparent.

First and foremost, we stepparents need to educate ourselves, which includes keeping our own oxygen masks firmly smashed against our own faces before we even try to help the other members of our family. So that’s the bulk of what you’ll find on this site: help for stepparents who are struggling.

However! Because stepparents are the honeybees of our stepfamily — out there buzzing around, finding goodies to bring back to our hive — it typically lands on us, the stepparents, to also educate our partners about all this. And if you just read that sentence like “Oh crap, how the hell am I gonna do that?” — yep, I totally get it! That’s why Dan & I also have a bunch of resources to help educate primary/bio parents, aka your partner.

Most of all, the success of your stepfamily comes down to one thing: the understanding that you cannot do this alone. Successfully blending a family will take BOTH partners, working together. Ideally both armed with patience, compassion, and a damn good sense of humor.

So! Ready to get your situation sorted? We’re here to help!

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

We’ve packed a loooot of info into this site, but it’s all organized into three basic categories:

💕 BECOMING BLENDED

Like any house, the foundation of your blended family is essential to its long-term stability. This is where you’ll find resources on how to stepparent, fitting in with your stepfamily, connecting with your stepkids, stepcouplehood & getting your partner on board, and how to actually blend.

➡️ BUILD YOUR FOUNDATION! >>

🔥 HELP FOR HIGH CONFLICT

Blending a family is already complicated, but add a difficult ex or disordered stepkid into the mix and you’re gonna need a bigger boat. Here’s where you’ll find tips for co-parenting/parallel parenting, creating effective boundaries, combatting parental alienation, and supporting troubled stepkids.

➡️ TACKLE THE TOUGH SHIT! >>

💝 BURNOUT RECOVERY

Stepparents tend to give this role our all — sometimes to our own detriment. If you need judgement-free support for stepping back a bit (commonly called “disengaging”), putting your own mental health first, and staying grounded amid the chaos, we’ve got you covered.

➡️ CATCH YOUR BREATH! >>

Oh and one last thing — listen, I just want you to know you’re not alone. I have been there. Every stepparent on the planet has been there. And we’re all figuring it out together.

You got this. 🙌🏼

Any questions as you go? Get in touch right here.